We are crowding into an elevator with a proper-looking couple in their fifties. My girls are decked out in full regalia — their hair crimped and colored with the hair kits Santa brought, wearing the dresses Auntie sent, with just a dash of sparkly gloss shimmering on their lips.
“Guess what?” Ren says to the couple– as she will to anyone who will listen these days — “Momma has a baby in her tummy! A girl!!”
We grin and rub my belly.
“Is it really three girls?” the man asks Cute Husband.
“Yep,” Cute Husband laughs.
“Poor guy,” the man says. “Are you going to try again? For a son?”
At this point, I consider asking this man about his prostate, his investment portfolio, the status of his marriage to the dour looking woman to his right.
“Just wait until they get married,” the man continues, “and you have to pay for three weddings. Tell them they have to elope.” The door opens, and the couple starts to leave.
“Yeah, yeah,” Cute Husband nods enthusiastically as they step off the elevator. “Go fuck yourself.”
He whispers it under his breath.
At least, I think that was his plan. But he has said the loud part quiet, and the quiet part loud, and in that split second before the elevator door closes, I am pretty sure they heard him.
The F-bomb. It lingers in the air.
We are silent, Mare and Ren blinking at him for a few long seconds.
“I think he heard you,” I say finally.
“Teach him to shut his damn mouth,” Cute Husband replies. “Spouting off that kind of ignorance in front of my girls. Being the Dad of girls is the best thing anybody could ever ask for.”
The girls nod their agreement, the door opens, and they step out.
I kiss their father. The way you kiss a man when someone asks you if you’d marry him all over again, and that’s your answer.
I laughed out loud so hard I woke my son. Damn straight, Cute Husband! What a great Daddy…
He sounds like a keeper, for sure!
Love. That.
What a great Daddy.
Good for you for marrying such an awesome man. And good for him for standing up for being a daddy of amazing future women!
Cute Husband deserves more than a kiss for that one.
What a guy! You lucky girls!
i think i want to kiss him too.
Just perfect
Good for him! He’s so smart.
That is the first time I’ve heard of an appropriate use of the F word in front of children.
Heather, I agree. I don’t generally approve of swearing at people. However, in this case, I concluded that what the man said in front of our children was far more offensive than a simple F-bomb. Cute Husband took care of business as far as I’m concerned.
Awww…Cute Husband is the best daddy evah. The best use of the f-bomb, and quite possibly the best defense against idiots I have seen in quite some time.
Well done!
Teeheee! I love this. My dad would have said the same thing
Aww! I never thought I would say “That’s so sweet” about that particular phrase, but it was!
We have three girls and get those comments all the time. It’s one of my biggest pet peeves.
That is one of the sweetest things I’ve ever read. And I totally get why he said that. I”m the mom of 3 boys and always get the question “So, are you going to try for that girl??” It’s as if you’re not complete unless you have kids of both sexes.
we have two girls and a baby on the way and i seriously want to punch everyone who keeps asking my husband or me “so, are you hoping it’s your boy?” no, you bloody imbecile, I’m hoping for a healthy kid.
I’m glad it’s not pregnancy hormones
Your hubby kicks ASS!
Yeah Cute Husband!
Well of course he said that. He IS the daddy of Mary, Ren & BabyGirl, after all!
Man, that is one great dad! Good for him!
When I found out our second was a boy, I got all sorts of hearty congrats. I explained many, many times that I rather liked my daughter and would have been very happy with another girl. She was under 2 the whole time I was pregnant. I can’t imagine my reaction to those jerks if she was old enough to understand how rude they were being.
I agree with the sentiment to a certain extent, but not wholeheartedly, like all of the other posters seem to.
I am one of 2 girls, and I asked my father myself if he might’ve liked to have had a son. He claims he was quite happy with his 2 girls, and I believe him, but the idea that he might have liked to have had a son didn’t/wouldn’t make me feel any less loved or worthy or valuable.
I also know several people who have acknowledged that they wanted to have a child of the opposite sex than the child/children they already had – it doesn’t seem to be that uncommon.
Finally, for myself, my husband and I are currently trying to have a baby and while OF COURSE all I really want in the world is to have a healthy baby, and I know I would love to have one or more sons, I really hope I get to have at least one daughter. I love the relationship I have with my own mom and would love to raise a girl.
In any event, back to the point. While I love that Cute Husband would clearly do anything for his girls, and while I think it’s fabulous that you are having 3 sisters/daughters, is he really going to swear at everyone who makes this sort of comment?
People say all kinds of stupid things to all kinds of people, just trying to make conversation. That doesn’t make it right, but I’m sure you and Cute Husband could come up with a wittier and more appropriate comeback – and there are so many thoughtless people (and so many generally thoughtful people who sometimes have a foot-in-mouth moment) that unfortunately, you’ll almost certainly have many occasions to use it.
I sympathize all the way around, bkm. I get parents who want to have a kid of a particular gender; and I get parents who get pissed when people suggest, even unintentionally, that one gender is somehow preferable, esp. in the presence of a child of the “less preferable” gender. Maybe the angry f-bomb made elevator dude think about what he said, and how it may have affected those little girls…or maybe he just dropped an f-bomb of his own.
People are messy creatures, and not entirely predictable. I think it’s a good story, either way. And the Angry Feminist Daddy is always one of my favorite protagonists.
Jess – I agree. I thoroughly enjoyed the story. And I wholeheartedly concur that there is nothing better than Angry Feminist Daddy. I also understand and appreciate that Cute Husband’s response was not planned, and was straight from the heart (as I said, I thoroughly enjoyed the story!)
If I thought that Thoughtless Elevator Man really believes that boys are better than girls, I’d hit him with a “go f— yourself” myself. But I don’t. I think his intent was just to make some lighthearted elevator conversation.
I also think I am thinking about this too much.
LOVE the Cute Husband!!!!
High Fiving you right now!
My brother is the dad of two girls, and he sings a song to them by Greg Brown called Daughters. Brings tears to my eyes to even think of it. http://www.gregbrown.org/gbiowaw1.html#daughters
Look it up on itunes if you get a chance. “I’m a man who’s rich in daughters”
Go Daddy!
This taps into one of my pet peeves, the desirability of having children of both genders. When DD was born so many people told us how good it was that we had one of both gender and we wouldn’t have to “try for more”.
I just wondered what such people would have thought if we would have had a another DS. Would he have been loved less? Considered a failure for not having created a “millionaie’s family’ (apparently one w/ a child of each gender, or so I was told after DD was born)?
The babies we’re given are blessings. Period.
I think Cute husband is a great dad and I am glad he said that.
Spending my holiday in a predominately male is better society makes me realize how lucky I am to have grown up in a house that did not have a gender preference. As well as a country that treats boys and girls as equals…for the most part. As a girl I don’t have to worry about walking down the street alone. I am educated, etc.
I am always shocked when people say things negative about having all the same gender. Like when someone has boys oh are you going to try for a girl? Everyone should have a sister, daughter, girl, etc. Ridiculous.
Happy Holidays!
They say your ears burn if someone is talking about you… and your nose itches if someone wants to kiss you. Cute husband must look like rudolph right about now… legions of women joining in on that kiss. What a guy.
*And what a girl for noticing.
AWESOME!!!!!
Way to go Cute Husband!
I think Cute Husband is awesome. Elevator guy proved himself to be a jerk several times over – I’m glad Cute Husband didn’t put up with him. Give him more kisses!
BKM — I totally agree with you that it’s okay for parents to want to have children of a particular sex. But whatever he meant by it, what this guy actually said to our kids was that their Daddy would have liked them better if they were boys.
Yeah, people who do that can count on Cute Husband’s swearing at them.
Crotchety elevator guy forgot to add in that Cute Husband gets to give 3 girls away too. How awesome is that? I have 2 girls and I’d have said the same thing.
It really is ok to have that conversation once or twice, but after people give the cute pregnant wife a compliment, the conversation needs to end. Elevators are 15 second relationships, and while you are just finding out that this stranger is having her third child, she is about to endure the idiocy of the public for the umpteenth time and hear every line about having 1, 2, or 3 girls again.
I’d buy Cute Husband a beer for that. The kids are going to learn the words, they might as well learn when to use them.
While I get BKM’s point, Cute Husband didn’t think about the issue, he just spoke from the heart. I think the “badness” of the salty language is much better than letting Roo and Mare have an inkling of a doubt about how their daddy felt about them. What they will remember is that he left no shadow of a doubt about whether or not 3 girls was EXACTLY what he wanted!
We just had our second daughter and we get that type of comment all the time.
And truth be told, in our private conversations, the husband has mentioned that he would like a boy. He’s the last male in his family with that last name who is of the child bearing age. I understand his need, but I don’t doubt for a second that he wholeheartedly loves his two beautiful little girls or would swap them out for boys. It’s just a desire he has in his heart, and it has him wavering on his two kids and no more rule, which doesn’t hurt my feelings in the least.
Way to go, Cute Husband! And I probably would have started asking all sorts of inappropriate, intimate questions of the couple, but I’m way less tolerant of crap than I used to be.